9 / 13 Liberating Presence - New Moon in Sagittarius 2024

LIBERATING PRESENCE

Ufff…. I don’t know if my world is ready to hear this… As this is going to get personal and edgy..
But I’ve been struggling with thoughts to end my life.

And if I am opening this side of myself to you it is not a cry for help but rather to share something very profound with you… I saw so much beauty thanks to it.

Sometimes I wake up with such heavy feelings, that feels like it’s not worth to live a life like that. I sense no joy of purpose anymore to keep my hopes up. I’m somehow really feeling something that is ’present’ that usually gets the message or feedback from my system, « don’t worry, it’ll be taken care of ». But when I feel like ending my life, it seems to be the most logical and relaxing solution. I just wanna say Ciao guys! See you in the after life. I’m not up to deal with so much shit here…

Yet this morning, while I felt this feeling of ending it all, I stayed in a loving and positive witnessing state to it… I simply followed my day and went outside.. As it was still very early and pitch dark there was no one outside and a dampening silence was permeating the streets…

I was alone and it was magically s-n-o-w-i-n-g ❄️.
Taking my first slow steps in the silent streets, I looked up and all I could see was falling snowflakes softly, gently floating down.
Some on my cheeks, some on the ground…

All these shimmering snowflakes looked like a starry night sky, where all the stars were gently falling. The picture, the feeling, the silence.. a wonder of what life can give you.
A blessing.
And to be able to do nothing but just stare at this beauty, looking how everything unfolds beauty around me made me connect two dots:
My desire to die is actually my desire to let go of all control in my life.
.
.
.

I wish so deeply to surrender completely - without a shadow of a doubt! - all my necessities to conform. To just be held, supported, consciously played with, to meet, resonate with hearts, with love, with awareness, with the great wonder I feel nature is sharing with us all the time. To thrive! . . .
You know this deep sense of peace nature is always sharing with us? When you walk in the forest, when you look at clouds, how the plants give their generosity, how a sunrise/set imprints so deeply in your being… That kind of peace.
And I want to experience that much more.. I want to structure my life in that way.. I want to stop identifying with all the fear, the madness, the cruelty that is exhibited in the world.

My life is still so inconvenient and I have decided at a very early age to take responsibility to it. I’m growing. I’m learning. I’m stumbling. I’m human be-ing.
And today life showed me how ready I am to accept more presence, more depth, how willing I am to let go and validate all that shit, and how deeply I am concerned to live a life of beauty, of wonder, of celebration for all colours. Feelings are just feelings. What I do with it is another thing…

So…..

How deeply do you feel life and death? I would love to hear your vulnerabilities and honour them at the same time…

Living as human beings is being spoken in many religious texts as a very unique experience. Angels like demons venerate our free will, and obviously being human is quite a powerful place to be in regard to every other life form. We are so free. And yet what we think of our limitations is our choices. WE CAN CHANGE THAT. First within, by tapping in an unbounded state of limitlessness.. so that your actions can reflect that state then outwards…

We need more spaces to practice death, to feel death, to learn what death truly is. And I am aware how much charge, taboo, and projections come unto this word ‘death’. That is why we should look even more closely to it.
Are you afraid to die?
Let me lend you my ear to hear your stories.. I’d be more than glad to receive your fears, let them land, let you know that you are safe even if you fear death, and that you ARE life beyond death.
In spiritual texts, death has been spoken as a GRAND opportunity to meet LIFE again.
The Sufi’s say: Die before you die.

Are you needing to die, to let go of certain parts in you?
To mourn, to grieve, to celebrate death?

I dedicate a space, a time, a field exactly for this purpose. It is called OPEN CONTACT and I initiate this immersion every new moon for 13 days.
We all need to die. And our culture really needs some therapy around death. So that we can revive a clean, sober, and pure taste for life. Your life quality depends on it.

The next round starts on the 30th of December !


Feel invited :)


Cyr